Gratitude and Survival

 

Is happiness related to gratitude? Are we grateful because we are happy — or is it the other way around, because we are grateful we become happy?

Take a look at this short video about gratitude.

At this stage in my life I have decided to live more simply and share what I have learned along the way that may help others The cultivation of gratitude has been one of the things I have tried to practice. I know, it’s difficult to be grateful when your beloved has died. But do I focus on her death — or the beautiful life we had together? Can my gratefulness override my sorrow at losing her? I think so.

Nearing two months now after Sabine’s death, I am working on gratitude. Afte all, were not my early blogs a photo-essay which highlighted the wonderful life we shared together? For those of you who also are suffering a great loss (and for those of you which will most likely suffer your own one day, I share these learnings...

1. Do not hold back your tears and your sorrow. They cleanse the body and give reality to what’s happening inside of you. It is better to grieve now than stuffing your pain and having it surface years later after having eaten away your insides and destroyed your health!

2. Establish a daily routine which involves prayer/meditation and physical exercise time. My dog, Mocha, helps me here as she demands I take her for a walk every morning.

2. Focus forward. For me, it was important to consider the essential question, “Who am I without Sabine? I am still grappling with this question.

3. Sorrow can be overcoming. I developed my own survival plan: off-load unnecessary responsibilities, set a few personal goals, and some exciting things to do in the near future. {For me it was a camping trip to Florida next month to visit family and in August a trip to Russia to travel cross country on the trans Siberian railroad.)

4. Don’t forget to connect with those who love you — and let them love you! Even in this pandemic we can use social media to do this. I know, FaceTime isn’t Real Time — but it’s better than not making that connection.

I can report so far, so good... But I realize that I am just beginning this recovery phase and there will be, no doubt, challenges and low points ahead. But I intend to meet them with resolve and gratitude. Yes, I have lost something precious... but Sabine was a gift beyond words and her love and care for me will, with God’s help, sustain and continue to nurture me. I’d call it gratitude.