The Birthing

In the mid-1980s, after five years of marriage, Sabine and I went through all the fertility stuff — mostly at the expense of the woman wishing to have a child. You know, shots, and painful procedures. So, not being able to make a child together, Sabine and I decided to adopt. We ended up at Lutheran Social Services in Madison. Because of my age at the time (43), the rule was that we couldn’t adopt a child under six years of age.

The adoption process involved joining a group. All of us preparing for the day we would receive our child from a foreign country. Then the notice arrived that our little Korean daughter we selected had an older sister. Would we be interested in adopting two children? (Taking into consideration that if her 12-year-old sister were not adopted she would work in the orphanage as an indentured servant for the rest of her life!) YES, we said, we’ll take two! Two for the price of one? Nope. You must pay an additional adoption fee.

And so the great day came when we were told to pickup our girls at Chicago O’Hare Airport Bursting with excitements we rushed south to Chicago.

I have told this story more than once. But I think it bears repeating. Having been at the physical birth of my older children, I found this experience just as emotionally powerful. Instead of a hospital birthing room with gowns and lights, we encountered an aluminum womb called an airplane. The birthing began after we did not see our girls emerging. Difficulties? A breech birth? We walked into the womb.

As we entered, we saw them sitting together in the furthest seats. Months earlier, we had sent them a photo album containing pictures of us, our house, work and hobbies. Would they recognize us? As Sabine approached and gathered them together, I took the picture below. It is a picture that speaks a thousand words. 

When the girls visited me last week, they found separate envelopes address to each of them. The envelope contained this picture.  

Memories. They sustain me in my grief. Remind me of the wonderful, adventurous and love-filled life we had together! In the picture, Sabine is bubbling with joy! As we walked them out of the womb, we shed many happy tears. Now heading north, back to our New Journey Farm.

(P.S. Those two little orphans from Korea went on to graduate from college. Sumi attended the Fashion Institute in New York after college and is a fabric designer in New York City, married her college sweetheart, and have a daughter. Yumi joined the military and retired as a U.S. Army officer. She married a Texan, have a daughter, and live in San Antonio. Want to talk to me about immigration?)